CHRISTMAS TREES & TRUANCY

The holidays are over.  For six weeks, it's been family, food, and fun on steroids.  It's time to collapse.

Plus, the end of the year in an estate planning law practice is a little bit like trying to fit a two ton whale into a small fishing boat.  It's a lot to handle.  All at once.

About 20 years ago, we had a particularly demanding year end.  I have a vivid memory of Duncan standing in our garage on Christmas Eve, hair dryer in hand, trying to thaw the Christmas tree.   We'd bought the tree weeks before, but hadn't brought it inside, much less decorated it.  Then an ice storm hit.  So there we were, a beleaguered family of four, just hours before the big day, trying desperately to salvage the season.  Our youngest son, Peter, was crying.  No, sobbing.  He was living proof that, in a small law office, demanding schedules are a family affair.  And sometimes the results aren't pretty.  Particularly for children looking forward to Santa and presents, but who instead find themselves standing in the freezing cold trying to defrost shrubbery.

Kids of small business owners have to face all kinds of cruel realities.  One night I was tucking an eight year old Peter into bed, and, as I turned out the light, he asked me, "Mom, when you and dad die, will your stuff go to Ian and me?"  (Remember, Duncan and I are estate planners, so this passed as routine conversation in our household.) Although stunned, I was actually pleased that we was looking out for his brother as well.  Then I replied, "yes."  There was a long pause.  A really, really long pause. Followed by a small, panicked voice in the darkness, saying, "But Mom, Ian and I can't run your office!"  Poor little guy.  Feeling the weight of a world he would never have to bear, but nevertheless wanting to rise to the occasion.  Young minds, and hearts, can teach so much.

But business owners' children also get to enjoy real perks.  When Peter was in 7th grade, he missed 61 days of school.  He wasn't sick; he was bored.  So I decided to take him with me on my business trips, all across the country.  Yes, I turned my son into a truant.  Deliberately.  I bought him a little business suit, and a faux-leather briefcase, then we hit the road together.   And it was marvelous.  He helped me with my PowerPoints, attended conferences, and learned to shake hands firmly while looking people in the eye.  He got to see how business is really done.  And he loved it.

Then he skipped 8th grade.  So, all in all, he went from 6th grade to high school while only spending a little over 100 days at an actual school desk. He tells me our adventures were the best possible on-the-job training. Sometimes you have to think outside the box.  And the curriculum.

As another year comes to a close, it's important to remember that, despite the day-to-day demands, life is full of goodness.  Enjoy your family.  And your pets.  Indulge in some goodies that you tell yourself you shouldn't.  If possible, play in the snow and embrace ordinary moments that make life extraordinary.  Then thaw out.  Preferably, without a hair dryer.