They say your childhood has to last a lifetime.  If that's true, I'm in a world of hurt. My mom was an alcoholic.  Not the kind who gets sleepy, funny, philosophical, weepy, or syrupy (we all know that last type: "I love you, man!").  My mom just got mean.  Evil mean.  So mean that she actually flunked out of the acclaimed Hazelden 30-day inpatient alcohol rehab program and bragged about it.  The counselors were probably scared of her.  Everyone else was.  Even the dog.